I sat in this corner of the coffee shop, observing the people that come and go. With a notebook and a pen in hand, I started to write down the words that came across my chaotic mind. The smell of caffeine was soothing. It pumped up my mood for writing.
The music started to slow down, more melancholic I must say. The lights dimmed a little, and people began to talk in more hushed tones. As I drown in silence, my chaotic mind had launched an uproar from the inside, creating a noise that nobody could ever hear but me. I continued to write.
“There you are!”
I stopped writing, and took a deep breath.
Three. Two. One.
Looking up, I said, “Hello! How long have you been standing there?”
“About a minute or two?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t notice you. Please take a seat.”
“I’m glad you answered my call.”
At this moment, the world had stopped revolving. It seemed like someone powerful passed by and pressed the pause button of life. Only the two of us were the ones who exist. Nothing was as wonderful and magical when his eyes met mine, when his hands brushed against mine. After five hours of uninterrupted conversation, he shared the news that created a scar in the deep depths of my heart— a scar which will take a longer time to heal.
“I’m getting married”, he said.
Everything became a blur. It felt like the world took a 360 degree turn. The sparkle in my eyes was gone, and it was replaced by sadness and regrets. The glass of hope had shattered, and picking up the broken pieces was not a good idea at all; It brought more wounds and pain. I gave my best to hold back the tears that were about to fall from my eyes.
There were so many things I wanted to tell him, but the only words that came out of my lips were “I am happy for you.” Those were the seemingly perfect words I could think of saying out loud. But deep in my heart, I wanted to say, “Please stay”.
Gazing at my eyes, he said “Thank you” and meant it.
I let go of his hand, got my notebook and pen, and kept them inside my bag. I stood up with dignity, and tried to manage a smile.
“I have to go.”
He stood up and hugged me tightly.
“Good-bye…”, I said.
“Good-bye…”, he said.
Before he could ask, say, or do anything, I left the man I dreamt of spending the rest of my life with in this corner of the coffee shop. I ran on my way to the parking lot. I cried my heart out when I got inside my car.
It was the most painful good-bye I have ever had.
I’d like to believe that fate had brought us together for one last time to finally close a chapter in our lives.
In this world, change is the only constant thing, as they say. As the world continues to revolve around the sun for three hundred sixty five days a year and twenty four hours a day, things, people, and even feelings change. Change is inevitable, and the most desirable way to cope up with it is acceptance.
/Photo taken on the 24th of April, year 2017/
/Location: The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, Solenad 2, Nuvali, Sta. Rosa City, Laguna/